Struggling

Let’s be real! Struggles are a part of life. Every part of life! Despite how well we plan things out, follow the plan and try to out-guess life, we will struggle.

I’m struggling this week. My hubby and I went out on Sunday for our “cheat” meal and to celebrate Valentine’s day. Dinner was good. We splurged and got appetizers, dessert and I had a glass of wine. It was an enjoyable evening.

Next morning, the inevitable happened. The scale moved in the opposite direction. I knew it would and completely expected it to. It did not move as much as I thought, which I was pleased about.  The following morning, it was gone again (after eating right and a trip to the gym). So that is not the struggle.

It’s how I feel! I feel uuhhhggg! Not quite like my old self. I have less energy and have not been sleeping well. I never sleep well, but this is worse. Then it has been a busy week. We had a wrestling match on Tuesday which lasted twice as long as I expected. Which left us in a pinch for dinner. Hello, local drive-thru. We had not eaten fast food in several months. It has left me feeling even worse than before.

On Wednesday, I went to work and realized I was in a “sassy” mood. In other words, watch-what-you-say-to-me-I-will-bite-your-head-off mood. I know there is some stress involved with this as things have changed at work (only temporarily) and it feels like there is more responsibility placed on me. In reality, there’s not because I am doing the same things I did before. The only difference is I don’t have the Boss in the office with me for a few hours a day. So in an attempt to “make my day better”, our field manager went and got me a couple of raspberry mini cheesecakes with fresh raspberries on top. Two of my weaknesses, cheesecake and berries. So long story short, I caved to the temptation and ate 1. They are about cupcake size so they aren’t huge pieces or anything.

But I’m still right where I was, struggling. Struggling to get back on track with my way of eating. Struggling to feel well. Struggling with some self-induced stress. Struggling to sleep. Struggling against temptation. I still have one of those evil treats calling my name. Trying to decide if I should just cave again and eat it today or try to salvage this day. If I don’t eat it, I will have to find someone to share the love. If I do eat it, there’s always tomorrow. As long as tomorrow comes and I don’t keep saying, “There’s always tomorrow….”

Pulling up my big girl panties and moving on. Regardless of my decision about the cheesecake, tomorrow is a new day. I will begin fresh and get back on track. I do not like the way I feel currently. I need to go back to my way of life, way of eating. Time to put the right fuel back into my body.

As I am reflecting at the couple of decisions I made this week that have “derailed” me. I wonder how I ate like this before. I mean, did I always feel this cruddy? Was I so used to it that I didn’t know there was something better? I know now.

Don’t struggle is silence. Tell someone so they can help get you back on track. Use your accountability buddy to help motivate you to get back on track. Just because you had a bad day or bad week, tomorrow is a new day. Make better decisions for a better version of you.

I will talk about nutrition in another post.

 

Update: I ate both cheesecakes. They were delicious. I’m back on track now!

 

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